Post-Apocalyptic Mother's Day Post

The world didn't end. This year anyway. Nor do I think it will be anytime soon, and even if it is, my adherence to my religious upbringing is a comfort me, however much a placebo. Fact is, if it ends, it's over, if it doesn't, there's more where that came from. It ultimately means to live each day as it comes at me in the best way I can.

I am neither pleased, nor am I ashamed, but I celebrated Mother's Day in a very passive way. I just didn't acknowledge it. It may seem petty on my part, but to make a big deal about it seems disingenuous. I waver between the two points on the line. I don't want to acknowledge my mother beyond saying, "Thank you for getting pregnant and giving birth to me. I commend you for holding up society's expectations as long as you could."

I don't choose to go into detail, I think I've aired enough laundry at this point. Just understand, I don't know how to celebrate the basic human fact that I have a mother. To me that's like celebrating the fact that two atoms of hydrogen and one atom of oxygen make water. There isn't Hydrogen Day that water is expected to acknowledge.

I don't know what to say that isn't fake. The years that I acknowledge it, it's a frantic search to find the right card that says as little as possible as honestly as possible. Things like, "I wouldn't be who I am today without you". I don't hate my mother, she just isn't really a part of my life, at least not in a tangential way.

To be honest, I don't even know how to celebrate "me" as a mother. I thought at some point in time after being a mom, I would feel like I could thump my chest with pride and claim to be the reason I have great kids. In fact, they have done all they have because they are talented and smart. I helped them grow, by caring for the seeds. There is no gardener's day celebrating the fact that someone planted a seed and it grew into a flowering plant. It's just part of the job and what the seed planter expects. If it doesn't grow into a flower, it's more that the gardener missed something.

I, too, held up the expectations. I got married and had kids, chose to stay home with them instead of working. I am glad I've been here. I've been a gardener to the most incredible thing there is. To watch a baby turn into a child, into a young adult... and I remember each step and I celebrate it. My babies are exploding with blooms. I'm glad I didn't let that seedling wither. Why plant a seed if you don't want to care for it?

You see, for me, every day is Mother's Day. I am a mother 365 days a year, and one day is just a blip on the calendar. I am thrilled to witness the life I helped create growing into marvelous and wonderful beings. Members of the human race who I believe will make it better. I didn't do anything special. I did what I was supposed to do. I was there. I really don't want to pat myself on the back.

To praise someone for doing their job seems akin to giving a trophy to everyone who competes. I don't like it in Little League, and honestly, I don't like it in parenting. We are doing our job as members of the human race. We are fulfilling the unspoken agreement we have with the universe when we bring new life into it.

Motherhood is just what women who have babies are supposed to do.

I want you to know... (my Mother's Day wish)

I've spent some time this week navigating questions about what I "want" for Mother's Day. This year is a milestone year for me in ways, because after 17+ years of being a mom, I am sending my firstborn off to college.

My "mommy" days are done. It's time to be the mother. And time to tell my children what I want.

I want you to think. By that, I mean that you need to consider the choices that are endless... and pick one. Intelligently. I also want you to make choices that are your own. Don't choose something that either agrees or defies what we've tried to instill. Please, I get there are times you hate my words, but for the love of all that is holy, do not choose the opposite based on a chance to defy me.

I want you to hate me. And quickly get over it. I know you will hate me. It means you are doing #1. You are thinking. So that trumps #2, my wish that you like me. In order for #1 to happen, at some point in time #2 must. You need to have such an opposite view of what I want for you that you hate me. Then realize, I may have a point. Stop hating me while you begrudgingly accept my wisdom.

I want you to know how to tell me I'm full of it. I want you to be smart enough to say why you don't agree with me. I want you to know that I already know you're smart. Prove it. Show me a reason to change my mind. What you don't know is that I can and will if you're convincing. Because...

I want you to know that I'm not perfect. My only perfection is my ability to love you without condition. I love you with every fiber I have. You are everything I ever wanted in life, I wanted to be a parent. I didn't know how, and I still don't but that will never change how much I love you. I know I screwed up at times. I know where I failed. I hope my failure didn't cripple you. Because YOU are so much more than me. You are me without my mistakes. You're young. You are unmarred. Your life is my hope. Base it on your gut, not me. I am not perfect.

Lastly, I want you to know... You belong to you. The world is yours and you can do as you wish. I can hope, pray, and even nudge you... but ultimately, you're you. I want you to have the confidence to be the best YOU there is. My work is almost done, but I'll never stop loving you. You're mine and I'm proud.

Thank you for being part of my world. Being a mother is the greatest honor there is.

More praise for the world's most noble profession: teaching

While the title is purely subjective, the sentiment behind it, truly heartfelt. As the month of May began, so did my daughter's countdown to high school graduation. Her first award banquet was the evening of the first, for her school's Speech and Debate team, part of the National Forensic League (yes, she's in the NFL).

Their teacher/coach is also a math teacher at the school and the hours he puts into both tutoring and coaching his students is nothing short of amazing. He's a quirky fellow, famous for his groan-worthy, yet endearing, puns. His students are challenged by his work but learn, and go on to excel. Rumor has it he once was seen without a tie, but never without a collared shirt, and almost always with a jacket. He dresses to command respect, but he also earns his student's affection. He is a class act.

That teacher inspires each of his team members to get up every winter Saturday morning and meet at the school, sometimes as early as 5 AM, to travel to a tournament to compete. They do so, joyfully. What a testament to his influence.

In four years of my daughter's high school career, I've never enjoyed an awards banquet more, and I've been to a myriad of them. The team had over 80 kids, and yet, our coach managed to make it seem like the banquet was to honor one and only one student. He praised each senior in a personal speech, talking about why they were an asset to the team. This year, our team won the state championship, something we later found out, that his math mind had calculated that they had an 83% chance of winning. From the kids who went to nationals to the ones who never placed, nobody was ignored.

I don't have a lot more to say beyond a sincere thank you.

Mr. Hamilton, you're absolutely the best. 

My kids are lucky to have you. Thank you for everything you give, heart and soul, to our students.

New Trailer from Pixar's Monsters U

We're more than a little excited for the "pre-quel" to Monsters, Inc. It's hard to believe it has been 12 years since the original movie, but in Fresh Daily Bread's home, our own firstborn monster will be going to college in the fall. This is a perfect family segue into the life changes and to learn how it all began with Mike and Sulley. From the press kit:

Ever since college-bound Mike Wazowski (voice of Billy Crystal) was a little monster, he has dreamed of becoming a Scarer—and he knows better than anyone that the best Scarers come from Monsters University (MU). But during his first semester at MU, Mike’s plans are derailed when he crosses paths with hotshot James P. Sullivan, “Sulley” (voice of John Goodman), a natural-born Scarer.  The pair’s out-of-control competitive spirit gets them both kicked out of the University’s elite Scare Program. To make matters worse, they realize they will have to work together, along with an odd bunch of misfit monsters, if they ever hope to make things right. Screaming with laughter and oozing with heart, Disney•Pixar’s “Monsters University” is directed by Dan Scanlon (“Cars,” “Mater and the Ghostlight,” “Tracy”), produced by Kori Rae (“Up,” “The Incredibles,” “Monsters, Inc.”) and features music from future Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee and award-winning composer Randy Newman (“Monsters, Inc.,” “Toy Story 3”).

For more information, like us on Facebook, and follow us on Twitter. The film opens in  U.S. theaters on June 21, 2013, and will be shown in 3D in select theaters. For more information, check out the Monsters U website.

On the receiving end of bullying

My last post discussed how I picked on a classmate when I was in elementary school along with an apology that I hope reaches out across the years and miles. I never realized how devastating it can be to be the target of someone's hostility until a few years later, when those same shoes were on my feet.

It was my ninth grade year, first year in high school. My junior high years had been a little bit of a rough transition from the comfort and security of elementary school. In our district, the three small towns came together in 7th grade in one building. So I went from 30 some students in my grade to about 150. That was the same year my parents began their divorce proceedings. It was a difficult and awkward time fraught with uncertainty. But I made a new friend who had just moved to our town, and we began to hang out at each other's houses. My friend came from a very large family and her house was always such fun to visit. The hustle and bustle of a large family just made me feel completely welcome amidst the chaos that was unfolding at my own home. My new friend and I met on the school bus and for the next two years spent a lot of time together.

When we got to high school, we didn't have as many classes together and we drifted apart. To this day I don't exactly know why we stopped doing things together, but we did which is fairly typical of friendships at that age. Around that same time, though, her older sister apparently decided it was time to voice her dislike of me, often and loudly. We still all rode the same bus but didn't sit together anymore. I don't know if I inadvertently did something to offend my friend or if the older sister never liked me and had her chance to speak up, but wow did she. I've gone over it a thousand times in my head, wondering what I may have done. It took me years to realize it wasn't me, but instead just a very angry young woman.

She would get on the bus and if I was on the aisle, she'd shove me as she walked to the back of the bus. I began to cower against the window. She would talk really loud about how much she hated me and laugh at me when I would either try to stand up for myself or goad me into responding if I ignored her. Meanwhile, the girl who had been my friend would just sit and snicker while her sister picked on me. I didn't know what to do or where to turn. There was nothing I could do to get her to just leave me alone. She was so mean and cruel to me. I'm not sure why nobody else spoke up unless they were afraid she would turn on them next.

At school during our lunch period, after we finished eating, we would usually go sit in the gym and watch the intramural basketball teams play. I was sitting with a group of my freshman friends and she was walking into the gym. As she walked by, she stopped to shove me and push her way through to the upper bleachers. She looked at me and sneered, "Get the hell out of my way." I mustered a courage that to this day I don't know where it came from, but I said, "Why don't you make me?"

It was the wrong thing to say. She slapped me across the face so hard I still feel the sting. It happened so quickly that not all my friends even saw what she did. I sat there in the bleachers with my eyes welling up with tears. I don't know why she hated me so much. I tried to act dignified and sat there for a few minutes stunned, until I trusted my legs to take me to the restroom where I could splash my face and try to gather my composure before I went to my Latin class. The bullying didn't really end, but I did my best to avoid her the rest of the year. I rode the bus in silence and ignored her. At the end of my freshman year I moved away to another state, which solved my own bullying issue by attrition. I wasn't there for her to bully.

When I look back on that now, I still am not sure exactly what the solution is. Ignoring her didn't help, standing up to her didn't help. I think she was just mean and probably felt safe picking on me because she knew how to get inside my head from all the time I spent with her family.

I think the best thing we can do on that end is to instill a strong sense of self and confidence in our own children. Make sure they understand that when someone is mean to them, it's usually more about that person's own insecurities than anything. When someone behaves in a way that makes no sense, it's not really about you, but them. I also have wonder if I had pointedly asked her in front of witnesses, "Why are you picking on me? Why are you so angry with me?" I wonder if I had put her on the spot and forced her to answer why she was behaving as she was if it would have diffused the situation. But then again, as I said in the previous post, there is no good reason to bully someone, ever.

At any rate, I will say that it didn't truly damage my esteem or have any lingering effects. I will admit, I looked her up and saw her face all these years later. That was when I wondered if I had asked her those questions what her answer would have been. I wonder if she's happier today than she was then. She looks much prettier than she did then with her scowl and mean words. I wonder if she regrets or even remembers that she was so mean to me. Makes me want to confront her, in a way.

Or maybe not. Maybe it's best to let sleeping dogs lie.

If you'd like to be part of the solution, I urge you to sign this anti-bullying pledge. I am being compensated to promote the Words Hurt campaign from TakePart.com. If I reach my signature goal, I will make a $50 donation to the National Suicide Prevention league.

An Overdue Apology for Bullying

This one is overdue by 40 years, but it comes from the heart.

I recently was invited to participate in a media campaign to promote awareness and prevention of bullying. After a cursory survey among my Facebook community, admittedly, the petition was met with some skepticism.

Comments included:

• How would you "stop" bullying? I don't think it will ever go away, so I don't think it's realistic to say that it will be eliminated. 
• No petitions will stop bullying. Nor will campaigns with posters and slogans. All the publicity and policing in the schools about anti-bullying has done and will do nothing.

But also this one:

• We can't change what happens in every child's home. We can, however, take steps to curb public behavior. Just because the root of something isn't readily accessible or easily altered, that doesn't mean we have to accept the fruit that grows from it.

As I read the thoughts of my friends, my mind traveled back to my elementary school years. I have one regret and this is my attempt to rectify it. I bullied someone. I've never made peace with my actions and maybe a public confession will help. Maybe my side of it will illuminate the irrational thoughts that drive a bully to bully. I don't know. But here goes...

In second grade, a new girl moved to our town. We were a small but growing rural community because folks wanted to get away from the city life. We were within 40 minutes of a metro area so a lot of families were moving to our town. On the first day of school, a new girl, Patty, sat against the brick wall of the school building during recess. She sat on the ground, arms crossed angrily in front of her and whenever someone would come near her, she would throw rocks at them. That first impression stuck. She was mean. As an adult, I realize Patty was probably homesick and lost as the new kid, but as a seven year old and self-appointed class leader, she just was mean. And threw rocks.

For the next four years of elementary school, new kids would move in. Patty would always try to befriend the other new students, but my group of friends and I would intervene and tell the new kid that Patty was mean and nobody liked her. In elementary school hierarchies, anyone who wanted to fit in would also shun Patty. From second through sixth grade, I stood between Patty and her attempt to make friends. Even worse, I was not mean to her face. Patty rode my bus and we were assigned to sit together. I was friendly to her face the whole ride back and forth to school. But in school, I made sure everyone knew not to be friends with Patty. I have a lump in my throat as I write this and I want to go back in time and shake some sense into my little snotty self.

You see, bullying comes in all shapes and sizes and as an adult I know that. I will never be able to undo what I did and it will probably always haunt me.

I don't know what the solution is exactly, but today's sponsor has some ideas. I have partnered with TakePart.com to circulate a pledge. I am paid for every signature I send their way to pledge to stand up to bullying and its damaging effect on children, schools, and communities. I ask you to be a part of the solution by joining the movement to confront this problem head-on.

Even more than that, I need to say this. Patty, if by some twist of fate, you are out there and read this, I apologize to you from the bottom of my heart. I have never regretted anything in my life as much as what a horribly mean little girl I was to you. I cannot begin to tell you how much I admire that you never gave up trying to make friends. I don't know if you even knew why all your attempts were thwarted. You deserved to have friends and I'm also sorry that I didn't recognize that you were a lost little girl. The good news is that I've used that regret to teach my own children kindness and empathy. I really am sorry.

If I learned anything from that incident, I learned that when someone is throwing rocks, they need love and understanding, not shunning. Maybe they just need someone to listen. I honestly didn't realize at the time I was being a bully, but that is another piece of advice I have. If you treat someone unkindly, stop. If you have a chance, apologize and mean it. Make it right however you can. Bullying has emotional and physical tolls for the victim, and sometimes the depression becomes so severe, suicide seems to be the only solution.

Any bully will tell you "why" that person deserved it. The bully is wrong. Nobody deserves to be treated poorly by another human being. It's just not what thoughtful people do. Decent people nip it in the bud and stop the bullying behavior. I also am going to give myself a little slack. I don't know why one of the adults on the playground didn't notice Patty's anger and take her aside. I realize the world has changed a lot in 40 years and maybe the mindset was to let the kids work it out. I only know that today, if I were the adult, I would try to find out why Patty was throwing rocks and privately speak to one of the class leaders and ask them to help her feel more welcome. Adults have the responsibility to set the bar for children.

I am being compensated to run this campaign, so I also want to do more than talk about it. If I reach my signature goal, I will personally donate $50 to the National Suicide Prevention league. I ask my readers to please help me spread the word and encourage your friends to sign this petition.

I don't want to take away from my apology, but just know that karma got even with me... stay tuned for the story of how I was the target of a bully later in my teenage years.

Lysol Touch of Foam Review

As someone who reviews products on a regular basis, I truly believe the best reviews unfold naturally. This morning I received my latest package from BzzAgent, a company I've affiliated with to offer me the first crack at testing new products. It's pretty fun to be on the edge like that. 

So my daughter invited some of her friends over to color Easter eggs this afternoon. I was delighted to watch a group of high school and college kids enjoying such a simple pleasure. They were a joy as they marbeled, tie-dyed, colored and dipped their eggs, creating a festival of joy for our eyes. 

Such artistry makes for dirty hands. It was rather fortuitous that I received my latest product from BzzAgent today. I even joked with the kids they could be a topic of my blog, if they used the Lysol Touch of Foam Creamy Vanilla Anti Bacterial handsoap. They enthusiastically agreed. The pictures speak for themselves. 

The grime of coloring eggs! 

Lysol to the rescue!

Clean hands again! 

In short, I am posting this review on this blog because honestly, my green living blog has spent many times decrying the use of both liquid soap and anti bacterial products. But because Lysol does not contain tryclosan (my primary reason for objecting to anti bacterial products) and because we also embrace a lifestyle that gets it right 80% of the time, we are happy to review and use Lysol Touch of Foam.

A few notes: 

• It does make your hands soft, as noted by not just myself but the testers
• Vanilla is not my favorite scent for body products (I always feel like I still have food on me, because I keep smelling it). I prefer to clean myself with non-food scented products. 
• Personal preferences aside, as shown by the photos, Lysol works and my hands are soft. Don't love the scent, but that's me.  

disclaimer: We got a free bottle of soap to try. Nonetheless, the desire to scrub the dyes of coloring Easter eggs off our hands are entirely our choice. Lysol served us well. My opinions are my own and I received no compensation to publish this review. 

Happy Easter! 

National Public Health Week April 1-7, 2013

Brought to you by MPH@GW: Master of Public Health Online

Indiegogo Start Up Fund project: The Victims (guest post from Adam Kern)

Fresh Daily Bread is happy to share our space with Adam Kern.

The Victims - a dark comedy about the Israeli - Palestinian conflict

An overly empathetic writer returns to his homeland to resolve an international dispute through words, but his characters have a different story in mind.

Executive Producer Adam Kern, and screenwriter Ken Kaissar are running a crowdsourcing campaign to raise funds to start their production company. Once initial funding is raised, the pair can create an LLC, hire an entertainment lawyer and start approaching large scale investors to raise the financing required to make the film.

The Victims is a story that shifts back and forth between two parallel worlds, one literal and the other poetic.
For the first time since leaving as a child, David returns to Israel as an adult to gather research and an understanding of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict, while Paula stumbles upon the garden of Jidi and Bassee, two creatures who lived in an idyllic world where they grew their own food and lived in tranquility.

Now in Jidi and Bassee’s garden, life is riddled by conflict and violence, until Paula, a peacemaker, comes to help them resolve the hostilities.

The Victims is a complex look at a complex issue in which what you see is not always what you get.
The film asks its audience to abandon any questions of bias and balance regarding the Palestinian / Israeli conflict. You will quickly find out that it doesn’t matter which side Jidi and Bassee represent, as both sides are hindered by the ever-present attitude of: “What do you want me to do about it?”

Runner-up for the 2009 Princess Grace Award and honored by the Lark Play Development Center as part of the Middle East America Play Commission, Ken Kaissar's The Victims is a timely piece that may not resolve the conflict, but can open eyes to how truly complex it is.

If you'd like to support the project you can visit: 

The Victims

Things Kids Wear and Wear and Wear

There are so many funny pre-school parenting blogs out there. I read them and find myself transported back in time. I didn't blog then, but let's just say I did so that I can capture some of the stories of children who eventually grow up and parents who simultaneously push them forward, then pull them back.

I have two girls. When they were little, their days were filled with imaginative play and rainbows and unicorns and maybe even a few kittens. Okay, nix the kittens, I'm not a cat person. But rainbows and unicorns, and glitter and beads. Oh the glitter! Oh the beads! In fact, I just had the unique opportunity to trade email with the person who lives in our old house, and 10 years later, the glitter still lingers. Direct quote:

... it is really awesome to meet the person who built our house. Just so you know, there IS evidence of you (well, your sweet daughters) as I have found little sparkly plastic beads in various cracks and crevices around the house. Since I didn't have a daughter until 5 months go, I knew they had to be yours.

But little girls are not all sugar and spice. Sometimes they are grub and grime. On the off chance (ha) that either of them read this post today, I will protect their specific identities so they can say that was her sister. Plausible deniability.


One of my children did not care for anything itchy. That same child had a penchant for running around shirtless and explaining that she was half boy so she didn't need to wear a shirt. Except when she took dance lessons and she wore a leotard and tights, in a very unique way. She wore the tights like pants, putting them on over her leotard to avoid the itchiness of the seams on the tights. And socks with hula girls over the tights. Because everyone knows the way to prove you're dancing is by your socks. But she refused to put her hula girl socks in the laundry, she would hide the socks in her bedroom until the following week. After a month of dance lessons, I think the girls could dance on their own. Or at least stand up.

The other child had "day of the week" underpants, with the day encircling the waistband. I had something similar as a child but never remembered what day it was, so I was not surprised when I saw Wednesday underpants on her one Friday morning. However, two days later, on Sunday, when she leaned forward in church and Wednesday blinked back at me, I shuddered. After church I asked her WHY she hadn't changed her underpants since Friday and she explained she just wanted to see how long she could go, and that actually she had been wearing them since Wednesday. She was hoping to set some sort of record. The thing that really made me exasperated was she was actually throwing a clean pair of underpants in the laundry every day so that I wouldn't catch onto her stealth attempt to set a world records for consecutive days wearing the same underpants. (there isn't one, although there is a record for wearing 302 pairs of underpants at the same time.)

Today, those same teenagers generate laundry at an alarming rate. I think that even if they look at clothing it goes in the hamper. I stopped doing their laundry unless they hit a particularly busy patch of time. Then I wonder what sort of records their clothes are setting these days. But even more so, I admit, I miss those days a little. Until I find the running clothes that were in the gym bag in the closet since last fall.

Top 10 Happiest Cities (infographic)

Have you visited any of these places yet? Will you now? 

Find A Happy Place: The Top 10 Happiest Cities infographic by spacechimpmedia.

Hobbit Blu-Ray Giveaway!

We’re proud to announce The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey coming to Blu-ray & DVD March 19th 2013! 

When I was in 7th grade, we read this classic Tolkien story and the world of hobbits, dwarves and wizards came to life in my young mind. I was enchanted. Now that same world comes to life on the screen and Fresh Daily Bread is offering one lucky reader a chance to win it.  

J.R.R. Tolkien’s epic adventure follows the journey of Bilbo Baggins, who is swept into an amazing quest to reclaim the lost Dwarf Kingdom of Erebor from the fearsome dragon Smaug. Approached out of the blue by the wizard Gandalf the Grey, Bilbo finds himself joining a company of thirteen dwarves led by the legendary warrior, Thorin Oakenshield. Their journey will take them into the Wild; through treacherous lands swarming with Goblins and Orcs, deadly Wargs and Sorcerers.

To enter to win your own copy, simply take the Quiz below and tell us in the comments what percentage Hobbit you are. (I am 48%). We will draw a winner from the comments on April 1, 2013 at midnight EST. 

disclosure: promotional materials have been provided to Fresh Daily Bread from Warner Bros., but being enchanted by the  The Hobbit is completely the result of a terrific 7th grade English teacher.

OZ Activity Sheets

We're thrilled to bring you some activity sheets to complement the Disney movie, OZ which premiered last week.

To print each game, click on the photo which will take you to a link for a printable PDF file.

It's thrilling to see what imagination has been sparked for not just the long time fans, but a whole new generation. As a parent, having an activity to reinforce the joy of the film enhances the magic.

We're happy to share these activity pages with you, from our friends at Disney.

Enjoy!

from the media kit: 

“This is a story of how the wizard came to be the wizard; of how a small time carnival magician—a faker, a charlatan—came to a fantastic world and was just the thing that they needed to save the day. It’s the tale of how an average man who was selfish became a great wizard who is selfless.”

—Sam Raimi, director

L. Frank Baum, who wrote 14 novels between 1900-1920, all set in the Land of Oz he so vividly created, never fully portrayed the wizard character’s background in any of his books. Producer Joe Roth found that fact fascinating. “I love origin stories and I liked the idea of how the wizard came to be,” says Roth. “So, going back to Baum’s books to research and imagine his beginnings seemed like a great idea.”

“L. Frank Baum wrote a series of adventures with multiple characters in Oz,” states Raimi’s longtime producing partner, Grant Curtis. “I think the beauty of what Mitchell Kapner originally did, along with producer Joe Roth and executive producer Palak Patel, was that they took some of the adventures throughout these books and brought them together into one concise story that depicts how Oz became the great wizard.”

“It begins with a circus con artist who gets caught up in a tornado in a hot-air balloon and lands in this magical Land of Oz,” screenwriter Mitchell Kapner elaborates about the original story inspired by the works of author L. Frank Baum. “Because his name is Oz, his arrival coincides with a prophecy that states that a new and great leader is forthcoming. Because the Wicked Witch has taken over the land, the people look to this stranger as this great Wizard. They bow down to this mere mortal when they see his name on the side of his balloon.

“This is a guy, bluffing his way through life because he doesn't have real magic powers like these witches do, who can become their leader and get Emerald City back from the Wicked Witch,” the screenwriter resumes about the story. “I liked the dynamic that people expected him to be this powerful wizard, which he knows he’s not. Yet, he can claim this throne, and essentially be the King, if he convinces enough people. Along the way, he realizes it’s not just about him. He has to do it to save these people.”


“What I love most about this character of Oz is that he is such a dastardly heel,” says co-screenwriter David Lindsay-Abaire about the film’s unlikely hero. “But, he also craves something greater, both from his life and for himself as a person. He wants to do great things, and, in the beginning, it’s only about money and power and riches. By the end of the story, he finds out it’s actually about finding love and friendship. It’s a very human story.”

The Bible on History Channel PREMIERE!

Fresh Daily Bread is proud to announce the great History channel  epic 10-part miniseries retelling stories from the Scriptures for a whole new generation. Breathtaking in scope and scale, The Bible features powerful performances, exotic locales and dazzling visual effects that breathe spectacular life into the dramatic tales of faith and courage from Genesis through Revelation. This historic television event is sure to entertain and inspire the whole family! 

Tonight, 03/03/13, is the premiere. Check local listings for the channel. One lucky commenter will also receive a Bible companion book giveaway, A Story of God and All of Us. Please leave a comment with your favorite Bible story and why to qualify. Winner will be chosen on 3/13/13, at midnight EST, so there is still time to enter!

Feel like a kid (part one)

Last night, I returned from a whirlwind research trip to Philadelphia and New York City to study some health and wellness exhibits for children. I am a research panel member for our local children's museum. Myself along with four other members of the research team loaded into a van headed east.

Our team is a diverse group of folks. The museum director is a vibrant lady with unending energy. She runs the museum as if it's an extension of her personal home, with pride and welcoming hospitality. I am the mother of two teenagers and frequently lament that "they never had anything like that when my kids were little", yet I embrace the opportunity to take other children there whenever I can. The museum's exhibit director is a young man, an art major, whose creativity is boundless. Rounding out the group was a dietitian who runs the area health education center and local coordinator for healthcare jobs.

There are several other members on the panel, but we were the five who were available for this research trip. We didn't really know each other other than sitting at a table together during planning meetings so I thought the trip may be a little awkward on a social level. But knowing that our goal was to find something wonderful to work towards for the children of our community, I cast aside my trepidation. We loaded into a mini-van with snacks, pillows, electronics, and a great attitude. About 2 minutes into the trip, I piped up from the back seat and asked if we were there yet. In about another 2 minutes, I whined that the educator kept touching me and wouldn't keep her hands to herself. The ice was broken and we began to feel like a group of big kids.We quickly took a vow of omertà, what was said in the van stayed in the van. That was an appropriate pledge since one person's cell phone ringtone was the theme from The Godfather.

Seeing the world through the eyes of a child takes some effort but our research team was up for the challenge. We hit the road for Philadelphia by 5:30 AM and didn't look back. The roads were clear and our mission in place. First stop, The Franklin Institute.


An impressive statue of Ben Franklin greeted us in the lobby as screens with Ben's words of wisdom surrounded us. His poignant observations were the perfect reminder of our mission:

• Life's tragedy is that we get old too soon and wise too late
• Tell me and I forget. Teach me and I remember. Involve me and I learn.
• An investment in knowledge pays the best interest

We spent the afternoon climbing around a giant heart, looking at preserved brains, and simulating surfing. We saw the workshop where the exhibit prototypes were created. We asked questions and got answers. Then we got in the car for NYC, made smooth time until we reached the Lincoln Tunnel. It seemed everyone in the tri-state area brought an extra car with them and wanted to get into the city at the same time we did.

We maintained a child-like sense of wonder and took some great skyline pictures as we waited.

We arrived in New York City about two hours after we approached the tunnel entrance. Our trip was halfway over. Stay tuned for part two of our adventure tomorrow... 

Why I love Facebook

I made a simple lament. I love to cook and love to make interesting food. This week, I had a taste for Pasta Puttensca. It's an anchovy, tomato, and kalamata olive sauce.

So I had this craving, but the local grocers were not cooperative. Four stores, NO anchovy paste. I settled and bought whole anchovies to make my own paste.

I don't want to be graphic. Let me just say there is a reason stores sell anchovy paste. Grinding them in a food processor is gross. Enough said.

Here is why  I love Facebook, a sentiment that required that preface.

My silly and momentary lament turned into a forum about local shopping, alternatives to that, and ultimately a coffee date. I'm meeting a friend I enjoy for coffee next week.

So say what you must. I love that Facebook brings us together. Even if the reason is the stresses one must endure to grind their own anchovies into paste. Ultimately, it's about the art of conversation. And I am so happy to have a date to sit down with my friend. Which never would have happened if I couldn't find anchovy paste.

So bring me a big one with everything, but  hold the anchovies!

Third Novel by Taylor Stevens: The Doll review

Now Available! June 2013

I first "met" NY Times best selling author Taylor Stevens in an online discussion group several years ago. The way she arranged words resonated with me and as our interactions grew and we learned more about each other, I asked her if she ever considered writing a novel. She told me she actually had and was trying to find a publisher for it.

As our friendship grew, she trusted me to read the draft of her first effort, which became the sensational best selling novel The Informationist, and recently was optioned by film director James Cameron, of Avatar fame.

Taylor and I have continued our friendship and had a few opportunities to also spend time together in person. It's a true honor to witness her success up-close. Admittedly, I like to brag that I was one of the first 10 people in the world to read her first novel.

That I am a fan is an understatement that must preface my review. I will however also say that if there were any reason I didn't think this novel was riveting or interesting, I would not publish a review. I pride myself on integrity as a writer and PR person.

I opened up my Advance Readers Copy (ARC) with anticipation. One of the things that I've grown to like about Taylor's style is that it's a slow build to the fast and frantic action. The story began slowly with very little detail. In a literary sense I unfolded my napkin in my lap and prepared to dig in. I wasn't disappointed.

Taylor has a unique ability to bring the most horrifying slices of humanity to our lap, without sending us from the table. Her story about human trafficking drew us into a world we'd not see or know otherwise. While the tales are fiction, they are so alive, the reader feels authenticity with each phrase. You aren't just reading the story, you are there.

I really enjoyed the depth and emotion she brought to her protagonist, Michael/Vanessa Munroe. We saw a softer side of her heroine. It didn't make Michael less strong, it only made her more human. The alliance forged was surprising. To say more would require a spoiler alert.

If you've been fascinated with Michael Munroe, that won't end with The Doll. In fact, you'll want to know more. Taylor has the ability to draw even the most timid reader into her stories of a rough and ready heroine, who suffers fools lightly and takes names while she kicks them to the curb. It's a vicarious thrill for the reader to walk in the shoes of such a strong star.

Three is either a curse or a charm. I wondered how it would unfold for Taylor's story. What I've learned is that this author has an unlimited imagination and can put her character in any situation and bring it to life.

Congratulations, Taylor.

Three is a charm.

Oz The Great and Powerful: Behind the Scenes footage

Fresh Daily Bread is proud to be a Disney blogger and we get to share fantastic advance and insider information for all upcoming Disney releases. We are really looking forward to Oz, and couldn't wait to share this interview clip with the costumers and actors in the film. Enjoy! 

Disney’s fantastical adventure “Oz The Great and Powerful,” directed by Sam Raimi, imagines the origins of L. Frank Baum’s beloved wizard character. When Oscar Diggs (James Franco), a small-time circus magician with dubious ethics, is hurled away from dusty Kansas to the vibrant Land of Oz, he thinks he’s hit the jackpot—fame and fortune are his for the taking—that is until he meets three witches, Theodora (Mila Kunis), Evanora (Rachel Weisz) and Glinda (Michelle Williams), who are not convinced he is the great wizard everyone’s been expecting. Reluctantly drawn into the epic problems facing the Land of Oz and its inhabitants, Oscar must find out who is good and who is evil before it is too late. Putting his magical arts to use through illusion, ingenuity—and even a bit of wizardry—Oscar transforms himself not only into the great wizard but into a better man as well.

If I knew then, what I know now

This morning was one of my more interesting mornings as a parent. I've been doing this mom gig for 17+ years. I feel like a grizzled veteran on the good days and an unrepentant task master on the bad ones. Regardless, I love my kids more than life itself and my goal is for them to do well.

So I was taken aback this morning when my 15 year old asked, "Mom why do you think we are so smart?" Do you think it's just genetics?

The 17 year old chimed in, "Yeah we talk about that sometimes, because it's awkward being the *smart kid*. "My kids asked this not out of arrogance, but rather curiosity. I never thought raising smart kids was a stigma, but for them, at times it is. My 15 year old piped up, "Yeah, why was I doing 60 piece puzzles when I was 3?"

The fact is?

I don't know. I have theories and as harsh as I am on myself at times, I guess I did okay. I wanted to fill their unending source of curiosity. I took them to the library and museums. I limited television time. When we did have television, I watched with them and then created games to expand on it. Yes, I asked my kids to invent their own Pokemon characters. If we could give a half hour daily to Pikachu and Jigglypuff and Charizard,  dangit! They were going to come up with their own character.

I don't know what we did or how our genetics contributed. My husband is a smart guy. We both are. But parenting has taught us that that it's rarely about the recipe. I just know that our kids excel. Nature/Nurture? I'm not sure. We went over a list of siblings in their school who are/were the top of their class. I am proud, undoubtedly. I see my children in the advanced classes, their class rankings and GPAs. I see their test scores. I know they excel. I don't know why. It doesn't stop me from being proud, and I wish I could spell it out. But my book would likely look like this:

Everything I Know About Raising Smart Kids

(crickets chirping). 

Fact is? I have no words of wisdom. I think that always looking for ways to stimulate their brains helped. I think that limited television and complementary assignments helped. I think reading to my kids helped. I think marrying a smart guy and his contribution to our gene pool helped. 

I just don't know why they do so well. 

I am just grateful that they do. 

My advice? Pay attention when they are little and give their brains ways to grow and learn. Find activities outside the school. Libraries, museums, theater. Put it out there. I did. I don't know if "that" was what did it. I just know that is what I did and my kids are at the top of their class. I just wanted kids who knew what to do and how to learn. I think they showed me that the did and could. 

Saying Goodbye to Memorabilia

I'm currently a fundraising chair for one of the non profit groups I work with. I've been combing through my possessions to see if anything I own is valuable enough to donate and earn funds for some of the charities I work with. I stumbled upon something that is so valuable to me, but not so valuable that they weren't packed in a box for over five years.

In other words, uncovering these possessions of mine took me back to one of the most special times of my life. It was the mid 80s and I had just graduated from high school. The most played songs on the radio were ones from Bruce Springsteen's Born in the USA album. My rock and roll groupie fantasies were on fire. I had been a fan since I was barely a teenager, when he released his previous album, The River. (Nebraska notwithstanding, as it was not played on the radio at all, nor did the internet exist. I had no idea there was an album between then).

Admittedly, a lot of fans have followed him longer, and may be tempted to call me a poser. I am a product of my age. As soon as I was old enough to really pay attention to music, Bruce Springsteen caught my attention. And thanks the great folks at Columbia House Record Club, for only 1¢ plus shipping and handling, within a few months, all his older music also became mine.

I was able to get concert tickets that soft infested summer after my first year of college. We sat in the old Cleveland Stadium, on the field, in the second second of row AA, approximately 80 rows back on the field. I spent the entire concert straddling between my boyfriend and his best friend Terry's shoulders as they tried to help me see over the masses. The mid 80s were the summers of arena rock and at times it wasn't so much about the concert but the universal experience. That was how I felt that night. I was witnessing history.

Believe it or not, only the really brazen folks smuggled in cameras or recording devices. Obviously cell phones that did everything had not been invented, in fact, unless someone was willing to disguise themselves as pregnant, the size of the portable phones those days would not be something to conceal easily. I know one fellow who smuggled an instamatic camera in his sock and got photos that looked like they were taken through that same sock. 

For the next few years of my early college career, I regularly combed the record stores with a great friend of mine. We were so proud that we found an early bootleg double album of Springsteen songs called "You Can Trust Your Car", direct from Kornyfone record label. Our joy quickly diminished when we listened to the album. If my friend's photos looked like they were taken through a sock? This album sounded like it was recorded through one.

Because memorabilia was so difficult to come by, it was a big deal whenever we could get our hands on some. In this day of instant Internet access, there is a picture or recording of anything I ever wanted to hear.

Back to the premise of this post. I have these great photos. I don't know whether they would be valuable to anyone but me. If I were a collector, I would want them. I'm not a collector, although I remain a fan. I don't need to see the pictures to love the music. The photos were taken before I was old enough to attend his concerts, when he used to play a small music club venue in Cleveland, Ohio, called the Agora. His concerts there were legendary and said to help launch his career. I don't know who took them and the story of how I have them is somewhat convoluted.

A friend knew I was a crazy Springsteen fan. In her older sister's stuff in their parent's attic were these photos, long forgotten. She had gone up there to find an old yearbook and saw them and figured they'd never be missed so she gave them to me. Nobody knew I had them and nobody ever missed them.

Now I wonder if the memories are more valuable than the photos or if those same photos could bring some of my favorite charities a well needed injection of cash. Readers? Help me figure out what to do. Any proceeds I make will be donated, but I don't even know if they are valuable to anyone but me.

OZ Superbowl Preview

Even when your team isn't part of the Superbowl, we all admit that we look forward to the commercials. 

Me, I'm looking forward to another advance preview of OZ: The Great and Powerful. I am so excited for this movie. One of my favorite childhood books was The Wizard of Oz. So much that I devoured all the other books in the series. This was well before publishing phenomenons existed and sequels or prequels were anticipated. But as a child, I patiently stood in line outside our school Bookmobile waiting for another adventure from my Oz friends. I read all of them. 

I loved Oz so much that for my 4H art project, I painted blown out eggs to represent each of the characters in the famous movie and place them on a yellow brick particle board road. My devotion was unwavering and remains so. 

If you didn't know that other stories besides the Wizard existed, allow me to enlighten you. My childhood fascination with Oz was so incredible that as an adult, I insisted on a road trip stop at an Oz trivia museum, in northern Indiana. Loathe as I am to admit, the stop was a cheesy tourist trap. That didn't stop me from picking up a few souvenirs to commemorate my love of Oz. 

All this reminiscing to bring you a teaser. During this weekend's Superbowl, Disney's upcoming feature, Oz: the Great and Powerful has a sneak preview. I'm excited for this movie. Almost as much as I am for an upcoming community theater production of the Wizard of Oz. 

It's Official! J.J. Abrams to Direct Star Wars: Episode VII

The combination of two entertainment dynasties has set the movie world afire with rumors and reactions. The Disney Blogger program has given us an inside track on all information regarding the Star Wars/Disney collaboration.

(for a collection of incredible mash-up art: click here) 

From Disney: 


J.J. Abrams will direct Star Wars: Episode VII, the first of a new series of Star Wars films to come from Lucasfilm under the leadership of Kathleen Kennedy. Abrams will be directing and Academy Award-winning writer Michael Arndt will write the screenplay.

“It’s very exciting to have J.J. aboard leading the charge as we set off to make a new Star Wars movie,” said Kennedy. “J.J. is the perfect director to helm this. Beyond having such great instincts as a filmmaker, he has an intuitive understanding of this franchise. He understands the essence of the Star Wars experience, and will bring that talent to create an unforgettable motion picture.”

George Lucas went on to say “ I've consistently been impressed with J.J. as a filmmaker and storyteller.  He’s an ideal choice to direct the new Star Wars film and the legacy couldn't be in better hands.”  

"To be a part of the next chapter of the Star Wars saga, to collaborate with Kathy Kennedy and this remarkable group of people, is an absolute honor,” J.J. Abrams said. “I may be even more grateful to George Lucas now than I was as a kid."

J.J., his longtime producing partner Bryan Burk, and Bad Robot are on board to produce along with Kathleen Kennedy under the Disney | Lucasfilm banner.

Also consulting on the project are Lawrence Kasdan and Simon Kinberg.  Kasdan has a long history with Lucasfilm, as screenwriter on The Empire Strikes Back, Raiders of the Lost Ark and Return of the Jedi. Kinberg was writer on Sherlock Holmes and Mr. and Mrs. Smith.

Abrams and his production company Bad Robot have a proven track record of blockbuster movies that feature complex action, heartfelt drama, iconic heroes and fantastic production values with such credits as Star Trek, Super 8, Mission: Impossible Ghost Protocol, and this year’s Star Trek Into Darkness. Abrams has worked with Lucasfilm’s preeminent postproduction facilities, Industrial Light & Magic and Skywalker Sound, on all of the feature films he has directed, beginning with Mission: Impossible III. He also created or co-created such acclaimed television series as Felicity, Alias, Lost and Fringe.

The 5 Money Personalities: Book Review

Every year, as part of our annual financial kickoff and January purge, we try to do something better with our money. It's an annual tradition where we reevaluate our savings, our spending, and our investments. With two high school aged children who will be in college soon, it's very important for my husband and I to maximize how our money works for us. When I had the opportunity to review The 5 Money Personalities book, I hoped to glean some tips and additional advice. 

The timing of the book's publication was perfectly aligned with our goals, as it was just released on January 1, 2013. According to the publisher, 

Every couple argues about money. It doesn't matter if you've been married for 40 years or dating for 4 months, money touches every decision you make as a couple—from the $5 cup of coffee to the $50,000 car. And when the two of you don’t see eye-to-eye on how much to spend or how much to save, that’s when arguments turn into ugly toxic fights that leave both persons feeling hurt and angry. 

The website has several free tools, including a Money Personality Profile. I plan to have our teenagers take the test because I think knowing your money personality is a valuable step in the start of any personal financial management plan. According the authors, the different money personalities are Saver, Spender, Security Seeker, Risk Taker, and Flyer. Every person has a primary personality and a secondary one. Marriages run into trouble when the core personality types are at odds which is quite common in couples. 

I did not realize that this book was more of a couple's class and needed to be read together when I wanted to review it. That said, I am not able to offer my husband's opinion or input because he does not have the time or inclination to read the book. However, I also can say that for our personal case, the book didn't contain any particularly enlightening information, but he and I are also very closely aligned in our approach to money. We both are motivated by savings and security. The book addresses how couples with different money personalities can find ways to communicate better, which simply isn't an issue in our home. While we certainly have our disagreements, rarely are they about money. We just are very similar in how we like to handle it. 

After reading the book, I can see that it would be useful for couples who do not see eye to eye about money, although I found the advice at times a little simplistic. However, that would probably be the first step in understanding different approaches. It is not a budget planning book or filled with tips to save money. It is a way to stop arguing about money as a couple. Best of luck! 

Disclosure: I received a free copy of this eBook in exchange for my honest opinion. My honest opinion is that getting something for free is pretty much in line with my Money Personality of a Saver. 

Making a Difference

Community Action Pack Tool Kit

Yesterday, on my other blog, Our Daily Green, we asked a simple question, Are you ready to be a changemaker? We weren't referring to working as a cashier and counting 43 cents back to a customer, but instead, we were referring to the ability to make a difference in your community. But I'm here to tell you about the ways I've made both kinds of change.

When I graduated from college, if you asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, my answer was, I want to leave the world a better place than when I found it. I still subscribe to that philosophy, but it can be a rather nebulous concept if you don't know where to start. 

My first job out of college was actually the same one I had all through college, but I was promoted to full time with additional responsibilities. I worked at a grocery store and we were part of the United Food and Commercial Workers Union. And wow, did I make a lot of change. Usually to the tune of at least 1500 customers per day at the store. After college graduation, I quickly went from clocking in and out without much thought, to really looking long and hard at what I did 40 plus hours/week. I studied the contracts and knew what our rights as workers were and before long I was elected store union steward. It was pretty shocking on many levels because without question, most of the members were grizzled veterans of the industry, folks who had slung bags of groceries, unloaded semi-trucks and filled the store shelves with cans in the late hours of the night for well over 25 years, whereas I had only been on the job about 4 years. 

I was in the customer service booth, training cashiers and programming prices into the computer. My co-workers put their trust in me to represent them with the management. In fact, I was soon elected to be part of the entire local union's contract negotiating committee, one of about 10 members of 26,000. As part of our contract, we were required to picket non-union stores in the area, or management could require us to take a cut in our hourly wage, to remain competitive. If you ever see picket lines around at local stores, that is why, it's part of the contractual agreement. I actually marched on a picket line while I was 8 months pregnant. I also participated in a city-wide media campaign which included television commercials,  radio spots, printed fliers, newspaper inserts and billboards. 

I still believe strongly in the concept of a fair day's pay for a fair day's work. We had medical benefits, pensions, and modest hourly cost of living increases. Our work force was able to pay their bills with dignity and honesty. Non-union stores traditionally pay their employees minimum wage for part time hours with no benefits. To this day, Walmart has more employees on welfare than any other job creator. 

This all was over 17 years ago, before I had children and decided that I was going to save the world 2 people at time instead of 26,000. Still I get the itch for activism and making a difference on a larger scale. That is what is so incredible about the power of social media and the ability to build communities and affect change from the comfort of your own home. Whatever your cause, whatever difference you want to make, you can join communities around the nation to pool resources and become a vehicle for change. The tools are at your disposal. Take a look and learn more about how you personally can make a change. 

disclosure: I am the luckiest person in the world. I am actually being compensated to encourage you to go out and make a difference. How cool is that? 

sleep on it

What a difference a few days makes! Last Friday, I regaled my tale of a volunteering day gone south. I had a rough class, a group of kids that seemed totally unreachable. I felt so sad that I didn't reach them and came home feeling dejected and ineffective. I take my volunteer work very seriously so when it doesn't go well, I feel like it's a reflection on myself.

Today, I returned to the same school, for a similar group of students. Upon leaving last Friday, I was promised by the principal if I came back on Monday, it would be a better experience. I was skeptical, admittedly. I mentally prepped myself thinking that if only I had known what to expect, I could do better. I wished desperately for a do-over because I feel like those young people the other day were cheated.

As I started this essay, a day makes such a difference, as does information and preparation.

I had a charming group of 5th graders today. Similar circumstances, in an alternative setting, with a full time teacher and aide in the room. The children all have to take medication for behavior issues and I was warned ahead of time that one of the kid's meds usually took the first hour to kick in.

I apprehensively walked into the room and asked the teacher if I could have a few minutes with her before I started. I explained with trepidation that I had been there on Friday, with the class next door, and that my day had been less than ideal, and actually at times frightening. I almost pleaded with her that if there was anything I needed to know before I started my day, to please let me know. I asked if I would need a talking tool (a small toy that whoever was speaking would need to be holding), I asked her if it would be a problem to put the children all together at a table, or would they start breaking into fights? I found a new level of humility the prior week, by assuming too much in my abilities.

Armed with my resolve and my bag of lessons, I greeted their smiling faces and eager dark eyes. I felt a warmth. Their desks were arranged for a little more eye contact and the teacher assured me that there would be no disrespect or cursing. That it simply didn't happen in her classroom. She also warned me that the kids may get a little rambunctious because they are used to routine and my class plan was outside the routine. I want to report that they were nothing more than typically energetic students. They were polite, on task, and attentive.

I had a wonderful day. I met children thirsty for knowledge and ideas. Every one of today's kids participated, said please and thank you, joined in the game and met my eyes not with hostility but friendliness.

I am not sure what the difference was, but after talking to the aide for a while during our lunch, I learned that the other class was taught by a long term sub and that they'd had several teachers in the past year. Meanwhile, today's class had the same teacher this year and last year. She knew her charges and their stories. They were good and bright little people. They were the product of consistency. One of them begged me to stay all day or at least come back. We had fun and they learned so much. I am so proud of them.

What a difference it makes to sleep on it. I think one of the keys is not to give up. Their teacher hasn't given up on them, she has reinforced so much with them repeatedly. They knew what she expected and they lived up to it. They are a reflection of her dedication to her profession. I sing her praises.  For a few moments, I wavered the other day. I was afraid I was unqualified, untrained and unprepared to help this type of group. But if not me, who? I had committed to help and I had a job to do.

I only have one wish now... I want a do-over. I want to spend another day with the other kids. I wish I could try again. I believe in what I do and I believe in the power of young minds to absorb. I believe.

looking over the picket fence

I spent my day volunteering in a classroom for at-risk children. At-risk doesn't begin to describe their situation. The class I taught at normally has 10 children, but today, there were only 5. Two were suspended, one moved, one was sick and one had a death in the family. The class is 3rd and 4th graders, and they are on their last stop of the education train before they are expelled. Expelled in 3rd grade. And then what?

My job today was to teach a financial literacy program. I was to talk to the students about how bank accounts work, how to deposit and withdraw, how interest works. I was to teach them what it means to earn money, and start talking about career aspirations, to get them thinking about things they do well and how they could turn that into a career down the road. To explain what a mentor or role model was and how to model behavior after someone they admire. I was to explain a work ethic and business start up costs.

I arrived on time, briefcase and lesson plan in hand. The principal pulled me aside before I went to the class room and told me what to expect. I had no idea. I am too sheltered, I feared, as I listened to him explain that this was the last chance to educate these kids. Imagine...  on their last chance before some of them are even 10 years old. His words baffled me. He explained that some of the kids could not read or do math, so not to lose patience if they couldn't. I tapped my case and said, I brought calculators to keep things moving along.

Then I confidently announced, I've got this, I have taught all over the city. I have worked with kids from every area and in all grades. I believe in this program and I believed all it took was a positive attitude, a different teacher, and a genuine love for what I do.

He led me to the classroom and the teacher as well as her aide wanly smiled at me. Maybe I imagined it, but I think they wondered if I knew what the heck I got myself into. I don't know. Maybe they were just exhausted. Or exasperated. I took a few minutes to organize my supplies and jumped in with enthusiasm.

Each desk was set up like a group of islands, with no child able to make eye contact with the other. No desk touched another, and one boy was even hidden behind a partition. I invited them to sit at a big table with me together because I had a group activity that was part of the curriculum. The teacher pulled out a big spiral notebook, as I unfolded the game board. I took a few minutes to explain how bank accounts worked and how to keep a ledger of deposits, withdrawals and total balances.  The teacher, meanwhile, was keeping a ledger of behavior infractions. Each student received a worksheet and when they rolled the die and moved their game piece, they had the opportunity to change their bank balance. It was a simple simulation game.

They wanted none of it. They couldn't understand why I didn't give them real money and why they needed to pay attention. They all wanted to go at the same time but nobody wanted to wait until the last person's turn finished. It was chaos.

I realized that I don't know a thing. At least not about this world. I don't know a thing about a world where children are kept separate because they will hurt each other otherwise. But I was about to find out. The morning slowly moved along and we found ourselves barely through 2 of the lessons, of which we were to teach 6. It was time for lunch and the teacher explained that the students didn't leave for lunch it was brought to the room for them. They were not going to a cafeteria, but instead were isolated for repeated behavior problems. They were at this school to try to earn their way back to their mainstream school.

After lunch I gathered them back at the big table to attempt to continue the lessons and get through lesson 3. The trash talking started and the kids were openly hostile. They were cursing at each other in language that I would ground my high school children for using, let alone 3rd and 4th graders. They were grabbing each other's papers, arguing about whose turn it was and smart mouthing me. One handsome little boy with long eyelashes and eyes so dark they were almost black was so angry I actually felt a tingle of personal fear run over my spine. If he had the wherewithal, he would have hurt me physically because I asked him to please pay attention while I was talking. I couldn't believe that for that moment in time, I was actually scared of that beautiful little boy.

Another boy kept pulling his hood over his head and refusing to participate, while another one kept doubling over in pain unless he forgot there was nothing wrong. He was feigning illness because he didn't feel like working. Another young boy with crooked, bent glasses explained that he had lost them at the gym where he was learning how to box so he could punch anyone who messed with him. The dark eyed angry boy called him out on his statement and kicked him under the table. Then it disintegrated. Within seconds, the talk escalated, and the n- word flew out as well as several other profane expressions. I realized that I needed to send the children back to their desk islands. On the way back to their seats, fists flew as one child got shoved so hard a desk almost fell over. Three adults (a teacher, an aide, and myself), five children and the children were dominating.

I opted to skip lesson 4 and combine lesson 5 and 6 with no table time or game playing. I cannot say I was losing patience, but I was out of ideas. I didn't know how to reach them nor did I know what to do. I felt ineffective. At one point another person from my organization stopped by to take some photos, and was threatened by the children not to take any photos. Then the kids took a few moments to talk about their counselors and conditions. They said very matter-of-factlly that they had been diagnosed with ADHD and bi-polar and I sarcastically said, "I never would have guessed." At that point I realized I was in over my head. Because I was wrong to make jokes, however surreptitiously. It's not funny, it's tragic.

We have failed the least among us. Society has failed. Yes, it takes a village and the village left. There were 5 children today who needed someone to care. By the end of today, I only wanted to finish my day. I didn't know what to do and it has me sad. I thought I had the answers.

I am home now, sitting in my suburban enclave writing this very raw blog. But I'm left with more questions than answers, I fear.

More motivation! Let's do it!

Weight Loss versus Weight Management infographic

Weight loss step one: Get the right tools

Earlier last year, as part of our ongoing blogging outreach program, we received an amazing tool that we plan to utilize strongly as part of our weight loss program.

The kind folks at Ozeri Products sent us a digital kitchen scale for review. We set the package aside and only discovered it again during our holiday preparations and quickly realized how useful it would be. Over the holidays, it was an invaluable kitchen tool for precise measuring. There is nothing more frustrating than spending hours baking and having a recipe fail. Many times that failure is due to imprecise measurements.

For example, depending how tightly packed a cup of flour is, it may weigh up to twice a typical cup of flour. By knowing a cup of flour should weigh 4 ounces, it is much easier to have accurate results. What is really great about the Ozeri scale is that you can even set the scale to deduct the weight of whatever measuring vessel you're using, so you can still use the measuring cups, but with a digital weight for accuracy. Another great feature is that the scale weighs in both ounces and grams depending on the recipe used.

The scale also came in handy for mailing packages this past season. We had a few packages we weren't sure whether they required extra postage or not, and with the scale we could cross check the weight with the postal charges. The scale can weigh up to 12 pounds.

Our final use for the scale is still to be tested, as we are going to be measuring all our portions to make certain we don't overeat. We are very excited and happy to work with Ozeri. We give the digital kitchen scale our highest level of endorsement and recommend if you are planning to lose some weight this year and want to measure your portions accurately, this kitchen scale is the perfect product.

See a copy of our review also on Amazon. 

Here are some of the manufacturer's details as provided to us by them:

• Ozeri Pro II Digital Kitchen Scale in Elegant Chrome, 12 lbs Capacity, with Kitchen Timer
• Newly design with a capacity range from 0.05 oz to 12 lbs (1 gram to 5.4 kg), the Pro II features a built-in countdown kitchen timer with 3 alarm modes (audible beep, blinking LED, or combined).
• Precision tare feature subtracts the weight of the container for the net weight of the ingredients; easy unit button instantly converts between oz, g, lbs, and kg.
• Large screen features a bright LCD with an improved viewing angle for the on-the-go cook.
• Oversized buttons generate audible click confirmation; 3-minute automatic turn-off preserves battery life.
• Finished in elegant chrome or black and sized for easy storage and portability; ships with 2 AAA batteries included.