You know you've never been outside the USA if....

(I wrote this in response to my friend who has lived everywhere... and knew she was a Third Culture Kid)... Feel free to add to the list!

Where are you from? means Which subdivision?
You still think Hawaii is a foreign country.
You can spell, but your kids cannot, since they have spell-check.
You can swear or toast in a foreign language.
But you cannot read, speak or understand it if you were to travel there.
When you write fancy things, you try to use a diacritic, but probably put it in the wrong place. You had to look it up online so you didn't just say accent mark and used the proper term.
You don't know why anyone ever worried about that metric nonsense.
You think Paris is that blonde heiress and Venice is a city in California.
You have a friend who traveled to Italy and was shocked that there were no Pizza Huts.
You get frustrated when a store clerk speaks with an accent and you cannot understand them. You take cruises in the Caribbean to soak in foreign cultures, in 5 hour increments during port calls.
You cannot believe you now need a passport to take a cruise.
You believe Epcot truly is a World Showcase.
You don't know where to go for Mexican food now that Chi-chi's closed.
You have watched Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade and now know everything you need to know about NYC.
Your kids have a shirt that says "Someone in Florida Loves Me."
You can never remember if it's Russia or USSR, but you know it's filled with Communists. Packing for a vacation means loading the SUV or Minivan. Full. With a rooftop carrier.
The idea of staying somewhere without a private bathroom or air conditioning is ridiculous.
You think the capital of Mexico is Cancun.
You get mad when your cell phone loses reception, even if just for a mile.
You give directions in terms of how many blocks.
You have lived in a town with a gazebo.
You have shopped at the Gap.
You own clothing that has stars and stripes on it, and proudly sport it on the 4th of July.