As 2021 comes to a close, I received news that two peers of mine, one from high school and one from college, had passed away. It hit me and my sense of invincibility like a gut punch. While it's been over 30 years, in my mind, we are all still those young people ready to take on the world. I have very specific memories of both of the people.
I ran to my photo album, filled with touchstones from the past, back in the day when we metered out photos, as a roll of film only had 24 opportunities to capture the moment. That film was not to be squandered. I'd slowly fill a roll of film, patiently drop it at the Fotomat and pick it up a few days later, or when I was really impatient, I paid a premium to have my prints following day. Often, I would optimistically get double prints on the chance that a photo came out so good that I could share a copy with the others in the picture.
More often than not, they were pictures with eyes closed, stray hairs, or unflattering looks that today would be either airbrushed or deleted into oblivion. But for me, it was still a reminder of the time and place, and I diligently added those unflattering photos to my scrapbook, with captions, articles and other ways to preserve the memory.
Those images are magical talismans with the ability to time travel. Unlike today, most of the moments were not chronicled with photos, but with stories, told from person to person until they became quasi-legends. Like a game of telephone, the word spread through the social circle. There were no hashtags or clever captions. There was no airbrushing or deleting. There simply was the ability to live in the moment and enjoy whatever it brought.
In our stories and conversations, we relived those moments until they became perfectly imperfect and knowingly known.
I resolve for the coming year and onward to embrace the moments of unknown and imperfection. We owe it to ourselves to live in the moment. I'm not going to share the unflattering photos I found, at least not on this public blog, but instead encourage anyone reading this to smile at the mental pictures you have of our peers.
Gone too soon, MK and LL, who made our collective stories better by being part of them.